How to deal with arguments in relationships? Arguments are unavoidable in relationships, whether it’s a new relationship or an old one because we are all human and not perfect. It’s just a matter of how wrong, how often you argue with your partner. I used to bicker constantly with my partner a lot. And it reached a point where we couldn’t correctly communicate anymore; it was arguments over arguments. We knew we had to do something about it; we agreed and looked for solutions and answers around. We found some tips that we really tried, they seemed to work because nowadays we only argue once in a while. Here are the steps we took to help us get on track.
- LOOKING INTO THE WHYS
A few arguments in a relationship can be seen as normal, but when arguments become a daily habit, they are ground for concerns. When arguments take a large proportion in a relationship, this relationship becomes unhealthy. In a relationship where arguments are frequent, a pattern emerges most of the time. Partners should pay attention to the pattern. Usually, arguments are caused by the same triggers. By closely looking into the whys of arguments, couples would see the deep roots of the issues. They can then solve the problems by eliminating the triggers. Usually, a common ground of arguments involved one partner feeling disrespected, money issues, addictions, …
- TALKING ABOUT IT
Once partners identified the reason for their arguments. They should talk about it. By communicating, they would exchange their feeling about the issues, know precisely what is causing them. Maybe the problem is caused involuntarily; perhaps it is unavoidable from the culprit partner point of view. By talking it out, partners will know the exact nature of the issue and how to fix it.
- TAKING AN ACTION PLAN
After talking it out, identifying the problem trigger, partners should establish a plan of action to solve the issue. Should the trigger be one of the partners feeling unappreciated or disrespected, they should make a plan where the culprit partner shows more appreciation and respect through their actions. Should the arguments be triggered by the lack of money, or bad money spending habits, partners should plan an efficient way to manage their finances. For any plan to work, partners I involved should fully cooperate.
- CONSIDERING THERAPY
Should the talking failed, meaning both partners communicated, they identify the source of the issue they establish a plan of action to resolve the issue, therefore reducing arguments. Still, then again, they fail to succeed. This could be that maybe the goal was unrealistic, or maybe one of the partners did not fully cooperate; hence the issue could not get solved. Leading ultimately to more arguments. In this case, if the partners still wish to continue the relationship, they should consider therapy with some relationship professionals for more help.
How to deal with arguments in relationships? Logical steps could be taken to reduce arguments in a relationship; these steps involve:
- Looking into the whys,
- Talking about it,
- Taking an action plan,
- Considering therapy
When both partners follow these steps and actually cooperate, they considerably find fewer arguments. Do you know any other tips that will help reduce arguments in a relationship? Please share in the comments section.