How to ask for less sex in a relationship? Sex has a crucial role in most relationships. And for some people, sex is a deal maker or breaker to say how important sex is for them. At some point in the relationship, one of the partners in a relationship experiences some fallback regarding sex. They experience low libido, low sex drive. Men and women can experience it. Many reasons can cause this decreased libido, including stress, mental issues, medication, hormonal, boredom, loss of sexual attraction, sexual problems, low self-esteem…and many more. The reason could be that your partner has a really high sex drive, and you cannot keep up with his needs anymore. In any case, there will be an issue called desire difference that needs to be addressed. Whatever your reason, if you sincerely feel that you need less sex, you need to solve the issue with your partner as soon as possible to avoid misunderstandings and arguments. Here, we give you some ideas on how to proceed in asking for less sex in your relationship.
1 # DETERMINE THE SOURCE OF THE ISSUE
First, you need to reflect on yourself to pinpoint the source of the issue. Ask yourself these questions
- Are you stressed?
- Are you experiencing some difficulties in your personal or professional life?
- Are you on medication?
- Are you still attracted to your partner? Do you still love them?
- Are you happy with your sexual life?
- Are you healthy? Do you have any deficiencies?
- Or has your partner a hypersexual drive? And many more.
By answering these questions, you may find the source of the problem; try to be honest with yourself. This will allow you to adopt the best way to handle it.
2 # COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR PARTNER
Once you know the source of the issue, the next step is to communicate with your partner. It is a good idea to create the perfect atmosphere, choose the best time for the talk. Do not jump on the subject randomly. Make an appointment with your partner to talk about the issue and give it the seriousness the topic deserves. As communication is key to every problem. Good communication can work miracles in a relationship by lifting misunderstandings, providing solutions, talking to your partner about your concern, telling him how you feel and what you want to happen. But you need to make sure to listen to your partner too. If the relationship is important for both partners and wants to save the relationship, they will find a compromise that satisfies both partners. So, talk things out.
3 # HAVING SOME ALTERNATIVES
Once you have had the talk with your partner, you should know where he stands regarding the issue. Compromises or solutions must be reached, should you decide to carry on together. Wanting less sex somehow implies that your partner wants or need frequent sex. If you need and ask for less sex, you will have to find other ways to satisfy your partner. This will help him not to feel too much at a loss. If your partner is okay to try different things not involving the actual sexual act. You can try spending more time together, going on dates more often and using some self-relieving sexual methods. If these do not make it up for your partner because he really wants and need this contact, you may need as a couple to consider involving a third party if you are opened minded about that.
4 # INVOLVE PROFESSIONNAL
If things are not as you want, after all the communication with your partner, after implementing your new resolutions. And you believe that extra help is needed, you can involve a professional. Getting some professional help through a sex therapist or a counsellor can make a tremendous change sometimes. They may uncover things you did not know about yourself or your partner. They could draw your attention to new things you can try.
How to ask for less sex in a relationship? Quite simply by applying the above recommendations, including determining the source of the issue, communicating with your partner, having some alternatives and involving professionals, will be of great help in tackling the problem. Do you have any tips that could help? Please share in the comments section.