What to know about sexual fantasies? Have you ever fantasised about someone else who is not your partner? We all do to some degree. According to Wikipedia, ‘a sexual fantasy or erotic fantasy is a mental image or pattern of thought that stirs a person’s sexuality and can create or enhance sexual arousal. ‘You may be in a serious, loving relationship but still found yourself having sexual fantasy on a real person a dream.
You can find yourself inexplicably fantasising about another person, and this scenario can make you uncomfortable, especially if you are already in a strong relationship. We fantasise for different reasons, including curiosity about different sexual sensations; other arousal methods; to escape reality; to meet unfulfilled needs; to explore asexuality taboo desire; to plot out a future sexual encounter; to relax or reduce anxiety; to feel more sexually confident; because of boredom. Experts say This is completely normal.
A psychologist says that “our minds are protected spaces where we can openly loosen and detach ourselves from social norms. It’s okay to get creative in our imaginations. We are liberated from responsibility and constraints, and we have an outlet for the many parts of ourselves that cannot be safely expressed in real life”. Let’s hasten to add normal to some degree. Therefore, do not feel ashamed of your more profound erotic thoughts. On the contrary, some fantasies can be revealing and constructive for partners.
Here we share in what sense sexual fantasies could be a good thing and a bad thing.
WHEN IS SEXUAL FANTASY A GOOD THING
The majority of people are subjected to typical fantasies. Fantasies are Natural: It is natural to fantasise about another person. The human mind is creative and exploratory, and fantasising is one way of expressing our sexual needs and wants. They allow us to enjoy total control and freedom.
Fantasies are Beneficial. Fantasising is healthy for you. Psychologists say that fantasies can be indicators of deeper psychological desires when you are feeling lonely or unhappy.
Fantasies can allow you to discover your deeper inner sexual needs and desires. Taking advantage of this point of view, fantasies will enable you to amend your sexual life. You will have an insight and understanding of your sexual needs. When acted upon, it could be a natural way of adding sexual variety to monotonous relationships.
Fantasies could be beneficial in many other ways, such as spicing up your sexual relationship by trying new things, incorporating new elements in your sexual life, being more creative in bed, and giving you more sexual pleasure. Therefore, contribute to reinforcing your relationship.
WHEN IS SEXUAL FANTASY A BAD THING:
There are some very unusual fantasies that you might want to get rid of. Sometimes we can have some dreams which we know deep down are wrong. Some of these fantasies will include the act of incest, paedophilia, violence, atrocities… these types of fantasies will mainly focus on morally, socially forbidden acts. We should not fixate on sexual fantasy, which instead of benefiting us, serving us right will put us in trouble.
When this recurrence occurs, you may want to seek professional help through therapists and psychologists to eliminate the fantasies and stop them from ruining you in the future. Deviant fantasies could lead to different mental disorders; they can change your personality. As professor Dennis Reidy, a specialist on interpersonal violence, says: ‘People who have aggressive fantasies are more likely to be aggressive, whether it’s physically or just a sense of irritability or hostile personality.’
It is good to add the saying that ‘thought does not equal action’. You should not feel bad because of some of your fantasies. It’s only when they become frequent, and you decide somehow to act upon them that there is ground for concern.
What to know about sexual fantasies? The answer is simple. It is normal and beneficial to have fantasies to some degree. You need to avoid crossing the line between typical, normal fantasies and unusual, dangerous fantasies. Do you have a take on the subject? Please do you mind sharing in the comments section?